Updates from Natalie Rodriguez

What Natural Ways of Managing ADHD Actually Work?

Thu, 29 Sep 2022 14:46:32 CDT

Recently I was asked about my experience with cutting out food dye, and other natural ways for managing ADHD, and I realized I haven't shared about it in quite awhile. I started thinking about all the options out there, about all the different things we personally have tried, both for ourselves as adults and for our 9 year old, and about which things actually worked for us.

There aer so many different sources out there, from your pediatrician, to your therapist, to your naturopath, to websites like ADDitude, to Facebook groups, to mom blogs, to your own personal circle of friends... It can very quickly get overwhelming. How do you decide what to use for your own family? How do you know what will actually work and what is just hype?

Why Parenting a 2E Kid is SO HARD

Wed, 27 Jul 2022 14:09:32 CDT

First of all, what does 2E even mean? Well, it's an abbreviation for twice exceptional. What this means is that the person, often a child, has 2 exceptionalities. Typically is means giftedness + disability (often learning disability or disorder) but technically it can be any disability/disorder, not necessarily giftedness. What I'm talking about today is specifically giftedness + learning disability/disorder which affects their maturity (usually something related to executive function). My experience with myself and my child is ADHD, sensory issues, and anxiety, but this could also easily apply to children on the autism spectrum.

So, why is it so dang hard? The disconnect lies in the difference between their emotional maturity (or really immaturity) and their intellect. These kids are so incredibly smart, often functioning at a level 2+ years ahead of their biological age. However, their emotional maturity is often that of a child 2+ years younger than them. So at best there is a 4 year age gap between intellect and emotional maturity. For some reason we (I anyway) am drawn to focus on the intellect. I want to focus on the fact that he's so incredibly smart, and that he can comprehend such complex concepts, that I (incorrectly) expect that he should behave like a child 2+ years older than his biological age too, or at the very least a child who is his same biological age. But that's completely unrealistic because his brain isn't wired that way. His brain lacks that emotional maturity, it just hasn't developed as quickly as most kids his age, so it's really unfair to expect his brain to do something it can't, just because he's so smart.

In my experience, these unfounded expectations lead to a good portion of the conflicts in our house. When we expect him to function in a way that his brain is not yet ready to function, we set ourselves up for failure and heartache. I recently had this illuminated for me in a previously unseen area...

Sensory Related Amazon Prime Day Deals!

Tue, 12 Jul 2022 15:40:00 CDT

I'm sure you've seen a gazillion posts, and gotten a gazillion emails about Prime Day this week, so I'm not going to be overly wordy and take up too much of your time. I just wanted to share real quick because there are several fun sensory toys on sale right now! We have several of these, and grabbed a few more this morning! Some are just for fun and some will be going in the Calm Down Corner that we are currently creating! If something piques your interest, just click the link and take a look for yourself! I'm not here to sell you on anything, just share what's working for us! :)

What it looks like to pivot, in business and in life

Tue, 28 Jun 2022 11:37:33 CDT

For several years, people told me how high functioning I am for someone who has ADHD. I didn't see it. I knew that I enjoyed keeping busy, but I didn't really see it as an accomplishment or something I could help others with. Then my son was diagnosed with ADHD, and I felt very ill-equipped to help him. That was 4 years ago. Since then, I have learned so much, and really so much in the past year! I often told him how ADHD could be his superpower if he would learn to use it to his advantage, but until recently I still didn't believe it for myself.

A couple months ago I pivoted in my business to serve postpartum moms, feeling like that's where I was being called, and where I would continue to serve for the foreseeable future. I struggled so hard when I became a new mom, and having my second child in August 2021, it was a good refresher in just how hard those first few months can be, which made me even more confident in my choice to serve new moms. I was so sure about my choice, that when I saw a friend was taking classes to become a postpartum doula, the lightbulb went on and I quickly enrolled as well.

I started sharing content for new moms immediately, and enjoyed doing so. About the same time though...

What to do when you want to give up...

Wed, 15 Jun 2022 17:17:37 CDT

Just a few years ago, life was really dark. I often wondered if my family would be better off without me. I didn't want to end my life, but wished I could just fade away, slowly being erased from existence so no one would hurt when I was gone. I now know this was a result of multiple traumas in my life which caused severe panic disorder. At the time, I just thought I was really screwed up and carried the fear that life would always be this painful on my shoulders like a 1000 lb boulder.

I'd often heard about a "gratitude practice". It was this catchy trend at the time, all the popular social media influencers were talking about it. *Cue the eyeroll* But the way they said it would help, while I wasn't nearly convinced, sounded great. I desperately needed help, needed something to change if I had any hope of surviving this season. I felt utterly alone, while being surrounded by people who I knew loved me and were trying to break down my walls.

If Mother's Day Is Hard For You...

Sun, 08 May 2022 16:04:46 CDT

For so many, today is joyous. For others though, it can be bittersweet, or downright hard.

For the ones who's moms are in heaven...

For the ones who's moms were absent...

How To Follow Your Intuition, Even When You Think You Can't Hear It

Mon, 18 Apr 2022 19:53:37 CDT

You may have thought, but I don't know how to follow my intuition. I don't even know what my intuition is telling me. Friend, I've got you! I had the same problem for years. People would talk about following your gut, but I didn't have a clue what that meant. My gut constantly betrayed me by sending alarm signals (aka anxiety) when I was faced with any decent sized decision. Even when I wasn't faced with a decision, I felt anxious that something bad was going to happen, that the bottom would fall out. In case you are wondering, that can be a result of trauma in your past. It was for me. And it really made decision making difficult, for years. Eventually though, I started to figure out what it meant to tune in to my intuition, and I want to share that with you so you don't have to stay stuck where I was.

First though, let's talk about why you'd even want to. According to heysigmund.com a significant study showed that the intuitive part of your brain actually knows the right choice before the analytical part of your brain does. So basically your intuitive brain takes in subtle cues from all around you to determine which choice makes the most sense for you. This can be so incredibly helpful if you can tune in to your intuition and use it to your advantage when taking on life's big decisions. But how do you do that?

Stop the Power Struggle Without Yelling

Sun, 03 Apr 2022 14:45:00 CDT

I could tell by the look on his face, he was getting ready to dig his heels in. And I could tell by the feeling in my chest, I was too. We were about to be locked in yet another battle where no one could win. We both thought we were right, our ego needed us to be right. But instead we were both going to lose. Not the argument, one of us would win that. But we'd both lose another small piece of that connection we have by engaging in another battle of the wills.

I knew from a very young age that my 8 year old has the same strong will that I was gifted with. It is a gift, but at times, especially when parenting a strong willed child, it can seem like a curse instead, for both of you. Sometimes it's just about the ego, but more often it is a cry for help and attention. You see, we've been through several big life changes over the past two years. First dad stopped working when the pandemic shut everything down. He stayed home with our son to do virtual school for months. Then we moved from Florida to Georgia last July, had a baby in August, and started homeschooling in September.

Sometimes when kids are acting particularly nasty and defiant, it's a reflection of the turmoil that is happening internally. It's really no wonder he's struggling with everything that's gone on. And the cherry on top is that he had to leave his amazing therapist in Florida and we've struggled to find a decent one since moving to Georgia. We are still looking, but in the meantime there are things we can do at home to help ease the battles.

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids, Even When You're Stressed!

Fri, 18 Feb 2022 16:10:10 CDT

There we were again, engaged in another yelling match. It would surely lead to hurt feelings, mom shame, and possibly tears. But I just couldn't help myself, and neither could my 8 year old. As two very headstrong individuals, these battles have been raging since he was old enough to realize he had an ounce of power to say no. It used to be worse, much worse, because toddlers, and also because I was far less healed back then. But it still happens far more often than I'd like to admit.

Before I became a mother I had these grand plans that I'd be a gentle, hippy dippy type mother. I had no desire to co-sleep (joke's on me there!) but I didn't want to spank, or be super strict, or be a yeller, and I didn't want to be the reason my children needed therapy. I thought I'd be nurturing and talk about feelings, and all that warm fuzzy stuff. And we do sometimes. My parents were FAR from abusive. They were honestly pretty great parents most of the time, and their shortcomings were simply because they were doing the best they could with what knowledge and emotional intelligence that they had at the time. But I do remember one time being genuinely scared, because I'd just pushed too far and they were only human. I didn't ever want to cause my children to feel that fear. And then I became a mom...

Why The Golden Rule Got It Wrong

Sat, 12 Feb 2022 10:12:25 CDT

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." As children we are taught that this is the way to treat people. But what if there's something better that we can do? Something that will truly honor each person's individuality and meet them exactly where they are? What if following The Golden Rule is actually hurting other people, albeit without our knowledge or intention?

I was recently on a call with my mentor where she was sharing about different personalities and how to speak to each one. She briefly mentioned that we often treat people the way we would like to be treated, but should really be focused on how they would like to be treated. And then it just clicked.

How often have you been in a disagreement with a family member or friend, and you two just can't seem to work it out? How often have you asked someone for a favor, tried to persuade someone to do something, or tried to influence your children, only to have things go totally sideways? The problem isn't them. And it isn't you either. So, what is the problem then?